ugh....

so, this is the thing about blogging. For me, it's mostly for me. Sure, some of why I do it is because it's an easy way to share news and photos with family and friends, but for the most part it's a way for me to document our day-to-day lives and also an outlet for whatever I'm thinking or feeling at any given moment.

That said, it is risky. Particularly when people that you know in real life read your blog. I mean, I worry and hope quite often that my mother has lost the link to this blog, for example. I'm a relatively private and introverted person, and I put more of ME out there on this blog than I do in most of my IRL dealings with people. That's where the risk comes in. Because there IS a difference between "online" people and IRL people. I don't really care if someone I've never met reads my thoughts and feelings here, but when someone that I DO know reads it, that kind of freaks me out because they automatically know more about me than I would probably ever tell them in the course of a casual friendship! Not that I have any big secrets, but anyone who knows me, really knows ME, has a huge capacity to hurt me. That's not something I take lightly, I don't open myself up to just everyone I meet. Far from it.

But, really, what would be the point of having a blog where I censored or edited myself? Just kind of struggling with this whole thing and feeling particularly judged and hurt tonight.